Do You Have Children?

“Oh, you’re married? Do you have any kids?”

“No.”

“Really, why not, you’d make beautiful babies!”

I don’t think I’ll ever understand the push for women to be considered equal, but peppering married women with the same question of if they’ll have children. I feel like I am in constant question from outside pressures and personal thoughts about when I will have children, or be ready to birth them. It’s exhausting.

I’m 26 years old and have been married for 5 years this December. I have moved, graduated college, worked, studied and survived a couple tornadoes in the past few years. I can’t even imagine managing all of that with a baby slung on my hip. Not to mention listening to friends talk about their kids gets me ready for a nap of my own.

I don’t think my thoughts should be burdened by if i’ll have children, will I have children, when I’ll have children and do I want children. I just want to enjoy all the hard work I’ve done to find my own personal path in life. Is that really so selfish?

I don’t think so.

What would happen if I never had children?

“Oh, you’ll want children some day.”

“You’ll regret it when you’re old and gray.”

“Your biological clock will tick soon, you’ll feel the urge to start a family.”

The older I grow the more I appreciate my sleep. The more exhausted I become with passing years, the more I can’t imagine having a child eating up all my free time. I like being able to binge watch Netflix, walk my dogs or run whenever I please. I like being free from as many responsibilities as possible.

I can barely handle my own mental stress let alone being responsible for another human being.

Maybe one day I will be ready, but it’ll be on my own terms. It won’t be a matter of stress. It will just be.

2 Comments

  1. Haha I totally understand. I’m only 22 but I feel that children are years away for me. I agree with enjoying the free time I have. I am able to travel when I want, or like you said, binge watch Netflix!

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